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What is the difference between unconditional acceptance in a relationship and abuse?

We keep hearing that acceptance, being non-judgmental is the key to a a successful relationship. But isn't abuse a possible (maybe not 'sure') consequence of it? Abuse results when the victim keeps telling oneself "I know he is that way. And I have to accept him. Love is about acceptance" Different people might have different 'thresholds' between acceptance and abuse; but isn't there supposed to be a solid, commonly agreed line between so highly opposite concepts?

Public Comments

1. you should accept someone but never unconditionally.. most things we want to change in people are stupid, harmless annoyances. i think that's where accepting someone and loving them the way they are come in. on the other hand, things that actually harm us and others should not be accepted. i think women often use that as an excuse not to "rock the boat" and leave a relationship.
2. I don't think that you quite get it. If you love someone, then you will never shame that person. If someone loves you, then they will never make you shamed. "Unconditional" acceptance comes right after that. Bringing up my children, I never hit them, I never yelled at them, or failed to keep my agreements. I loved them "unconditionally," and never made them wrong, or tried to control them. I only wanted to help them... pave the way, and make sure they have something nutritious in their lunch box.