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how do you wish someone happy birthday when they are in a situation like this?

If someone is in hospice care and his/her birthday is coming up, how would you write a birthday card to wish them happy birthday, knowing that her/she only have about a week to live.

Public Comments

1. Still, it can be a day filled with love. Happy Birthday doesn't seem inappropriate to me. Maybe something that says how special they are, moreso than it being a happy year.
2. Sure! Go ahead and wish them a happy birthday, in any way you can. Let them know that you recognize it as *their* day, that you value the person, and maybe a gift they can use "right now". I think the "many happy returns" thing would be a little gauche if the person has maybe a week more to live.
3. just tell them. act as if they're not going to die.
4. Well, if they quite literally have only one week to live, then don't send a stock, off-the-shelf "birthday" card, send one of those blank cards and write your own personal message in it in which you might mention their birthday, but don't wish them a "happy" birthday. For example, a friend of mine's husband passed away, and just a couple of months later I wished her a Merry Christmas and she told me, quite firmly, that there was absolutely nothing "merry" about it at all, so go very cautiously here.
5. Send a non specific card with a comment indicating he/she is in your thoughts. People just want to know they are cared about.
6. You don't have to wish them a happy birthday but try a message like this: "It's your birthday! May this day be spent with the ones you love"
7. I would have to know how close your relationship is with this person to give ideas, but I do know that if I knew this birthday would be my last, I would love for those who care about me to recognize it and make it special!
8. If they are that close to death, I wouldn't mail a card. I would visit or have someone hold the phone to their ear. People are often unconscious in the final days. Tell them you know it's their birthday and love them. Perhaps, you can recall a fond memory you have of them.