Success Happy

Is it wrong of me, to hate school with such a passion?

Hopefully this won't be too long. I'm sitting here right now, procrastinating and trying to take my mind off the AP English essay I have due tomorrow. We're supposed to be writing a descriptive essay - something we've never talked about, something we don't know how to set up, and we're supposed to do it in third person. Personally, I have a very hard time coping with the concept of describing a personal experience without actually referring to myself, or disrupting the "flow" of the words. And here I have been for the last two hours, sitting at the keyboard, trying to come up with something to write about it. My Word Document is not blank for lack of creativity, for lack of originality, but rather, for lack of interest. I do not care to write a paper on some mundane topic, following arcane rules that hinder my writing rather than help it. I'm capable of writing very well in the third-person tense, but in this scenario, I cannot truthfully say that my essay can reach its full potential without bringing "you and I" into it. Why should I purposefully distance myself from that which is about me, about who I am, what have I done, and what I have seen? I cannot understand this, nor can I understand the logic behind school. Seven hours of my day, spent in the company of the types of people I would prefer not to associate with. Sports obsessed idiots, video-game playing geeks, and a light smattering of those whose minds reside in the clouds, rather than on Earth. There is nobody who talks about politics, there is nobody who talks about current events, contemporary society, or the problems of the world. Everything is so focused on "me, me, me, my girlfriend, my boyfriend, me, me, me", when the purpose of school is supposed to be opening students up to the world, rather than forcing them into such unpleasant circumstances that they seek to cut themselves off from it. I'm sixteen years old, and a junior, and as of next year, I'll be out of high school for good. In the twelve years I've been in school, I believe that I can say that, through the unique kind of observation that comes through being a part of the system, rather than at its forefront, that learning does not occur here. Memorization by rote, destruction of creativity (labeled as dissension), and the unmaking of the individual... Those things, they occur here. But certainly not learning. Can I say that I have not learned anything from school? No, I cannot. I have learned basic math which I can use throughout my life, and an array of useless equations, dates, numbers, and words. That is the scope of what I have learned. Rather than inside the walls of this wretched institution that we label a place of learning, my education takes place outside of it. I read "Jurassic Park", books by Michael Crichton and Stephen King when I was in Kindergarten and the first grade. My mother taught me to love to learn - and I do. I love to learn about those things which interest me, to heap more and more onto my talents, while trying to balance my weaknesses. I will never be a mathematician, or a Calculus whiz - I will never be able to see, why then, that I am forced to learn that which I do not wish to learn. Is it not counter-productive, to bind a persons hands behind their back, to cram a book down their throat, to tape their eyelids closed in ever-lasting ignorance? For is it not ignorance that we generate when we guide a body so narrowly down upon one path, letting them not wander, but rather setting them straight whenever they wish to discover something for themselves? Education can come only from within. No teacher, no professor, no parent can force a child to learn. That decision lies ultimately with the individual. If their priorities are outside the realm of academia, then let them go there. I just don't understand this. Am I fool, is it wrong of me, to hate school with such a passion? To think that it kidnaps rather than captivates, holds hostage rather than sets free? There could be so many other things I could be using my time for, rather than writing an essay; I prefer this to that. I could be reading, I could be writing, I could be dancing, I could be skating - I could be learning. What about you? After-note: I literally wrote this within five minutes. If it sounds bad, I apologize. If it's written poorly, I apologize. If you disagree with what I've said, that's not my problem. Please try to formulate an intelligent argument that I can actually connect with, rather than trying to persuade me to change my own sense of educational morality. As always, feel free to send me an e-mail if you have something long (or private) to say. I get quite a few of them from people who read my questions, so I won't think you're a freak or anything. K, every time I saw "as an after-note", or "as a foot-note", I have a lot more to throw in. Now, I also want to apologize if I come off as being a bit pretentious. I'm really not. In Okay, did I ever say that: A) I didn't have friends. I have friends that I look forward to talking to. Unfortunately, I prefer not to see them in the context of school. B) I wanted to kill my brain cells. Because I really don't. Sorry. I dont see why you have to quit school, its a pretty stupid idea. and if you wrote that question in only a few minutes...thats amazing! see what you can do? why werent you doing your project withh all that typing???? Do you really think you will be more succesful quiting school? i mean really? --- I never said I was going to quit school, moron. I'm sorry, that was mean.

Public Comments

1. u can make friends with the pot heads and smoke with them its really fun its wat i do i used to hate school i hated people until i met with them now i have something to look forward with school (smoking)
2. well im a freshman and i understand how you feel, i hate school a lot as well, but you will become a very unsuccesful person....youwill have very little money though you will have to work harder. how will you support a family with 10 bucks an hour???? if u want to live off the streets, then go ahead and quit school....look like a total bum who smokes crack all day like Tdog says he does. I dont see why you have to quit school, its a pretty stupid idea. and if you wrote that question in only a few minutes...thats amazing! see what you can do? why werent you doing your project withh all that typing???? Do you really think you will be more succesful quiting school? i mean really?
3. I have to agree with you. Simply put- High school is the epitome of crap. I was you, in high school. I recently graduated, completed my first semester of classes- Only to start anew this semester. I cannot tell you how many times I wanted to cry in frustration back in high school. Between girls bouncing through the halls, sucking off of drama as if it were their life-force.. And the over-testosteroned football stars fighting each other for dominance.. And then being forced out of bed in the wee hours of the morning, to be crammed in a single building with all of that? Every single day? It was pure torture. I always felt my time would be better spent somewhere else. I always pleaded with my mom to home school me, even though I had friends and did well in classes. I just hated school- As do you. Your statement pretty much sums up everything that went through my head back then. The problem with school, is school teaches students to hate it. They offer nothing of excitement- And merely sweep the intelligent students that behave well, under the mats. Somewhere along the way, I learned to tolerate it. I loved to write- Creatively, of course, and brought a notebook in for journal entries or my own creative work. It helped pass the countless minutes of time wasted. Sadly, you'll need your high school degree. Following that, you'll need a college degree to do whatever it is you wish to do in life. College is better- Less time is wasted, and there is more of a focus on the material. It helps that you get to choose your classes. You're an intelligent kid. Hang in there- I know it's tough, but hey- Think of it as a lesson in entertaining yourself even if you believe your time/the institution is wasted.
4. While I disagree with you on the other students - I feel that, despite their interests seeming trivial, people are entitled to focus their lives on whatever makes them happy, as they should - I completely agree with and understand the rest. I didn't get along well in school. It was never that I couldn't handle the material (right from junior kindergarten it was too easy), or that the other students made life difficult (though I was exceptionally shy until I was thirteen), but rather, as you've mentioned, the limitations and use of force so lovingly embraced by those in the "education" field. School seems to attempt to destroy independent thought, and reinforces dependence on its system and on authority. Maybe it's just paranoid fantasy and stupid conspiracy, but the only way I can understand the school system as it currently exists, is as a place where people are broken and domesticated - the mindless lessons and memorisation, the complete surrender to appointed authority... to me, they are all just methods to create compliance and a population who will believe what they are told, who will be quiet and follow orders. And is it really so hard to believe, that such a respected part of society could be so contemptuous? Looking back on history, those types of institutions seem to be the most corrupt, deceiving, and exploitative. The tradition (and now socially required ritual) of completing elementary and secondary school, and continuing to post-secondary schooling just seems to lead on to more of the same throughout the rest of life: A pointless job, working to make someone else rich; getting married, often out of social compulsion; having and raising children into the same meaningless, scripted life... retirement might go well, it might not, but at that point you've already thrown away half of your life fulfilling stupid "requirements". So, I dropped out of high school. Most people see that as the stupidest thing one could do, but personally, any life that requires me to sell my soul to the hell of institutional "education" isn't one that I want. Yeah, I have a minimum wage job right now (I'm only 19), but I have quite a lot of freedom at it, and time to do the things I want. Like you, I write. I also skate. Since leaving school, I've had so much more time, and much more of a desire to read and write; I've learned to sew, knit; I've learned a few different instruments... leaving school freed me up to learn and actually do what matters to me. I hope you graduate soon so you can have the same.