Success Happy

My Graduate school classmates are driving me crazy? advice?

I am in a small, competitive program in a specialized field of engineering. I know it's hard work but I strive to achieve balance in my life and I am in no way shape or form a slacker. I just have a job with a major company and a life outside of my career too! My classmates are really out of control with the competition lately. Whenever I get paired up with one to work on a project, I get bombarded with emails, phone calls, and backhanded remarks 24/7. I give them absolutely no reason to ever worry as I have never turned in anything below an A quality paper or project since I have been there. When we have a lab together, many of them make sure to cover up their papers (even though we are supposed to work together as a group) and even bring their equipment to a corner of the room to work away from the group. In class, asking an honest question is an open invitation for a full on debate! One time I even got stopped in the middle of a power point presentation I was giving by a woman trying to debate me!!! IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PRESENTATION!!! She didn't even have the courtesy to wait until the Q/A session. I got paired up with someone for a very simple project (which will take an hour or two tops) that is due in a month and I have already been sent 3 emails which were forwarded to our professor for absolutely no reason because there was no reason to involve him in the matter. If I make a mistake, forget it...there's at least 5 fingers ready behind me to point it out. I am running out of comebacks and I am loosing my patience. I am no longer able to play it as cool as I used to. I need advice from people on how to better deal with the situation at hand. I don't want to loose my mind, but I feel like I am starting to. They stress me out more than the actual work does!!!! Was everyone else's grad program THIS competitive?

Public Comments

1. All I can say is, I feel for you, my friend. I am in a graduate program that I thought would not be competitive, at all. It is at a place that is probably one tier below my competency level -- but even here, people are working so hard to become king of a very small molehill. And some of them are antagonistic and downright mean about it. It is, frankly, ridiculous. I think venting to somebody is really valuable and important -- maybe even somebody like on the Internet. I just came back from the gym, where I got some of my built-up aggression out. For me, I need to keep perspective, and realize that school is not my world. That these people are frankly, immature, insecure, and small -- and that they will, one day, find their own comeuppance. I know that I am valuable. I know that I have intelligence. I know I am not a dumb ass. As long as I firmly hold on to this knowledge in myself and I see myself through the eyes of those who genuinely see me, I am one step ahead of the game. I know I have worth. I know I am worthwhile. As long as I can hold onto that, it is easier to stay balanced in the midst of a world that lives off of fear. Also -- try reading this: I think it helped me. http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-With-Overly-Competitive-Colleagues