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I've had a horrible change happen in my life. What caused it?

I shouldn't have waited all summer to post this, but it hits me hard every night and I've finally gained the will power to go here and type this up. I'm a 17 year old boy going about to go into my last year of highschool. Mid-sophmore year I started to feel this change come upon me and it came with many different symptoms. I can't explain what the change was, but I can describe the feeling. This is what I felt in the outcome: I became very slow, life seemed to be flying by, I space out alot, I became more relaxed in a way that I am lazy and unprepared, I eat alot, I get depressed over small things, I became more antisocial, my brain feels like its melted, I feel like I am a robot and am going through life the same as everyone on the planet, I am less responsive, my senses aren't working properly, I ignore all the problems in my life, and worst of all I have no control over what I do. By control I mean I can't force myself to stop doing something especially if its an addictive activity. Like I can't control many aspects of my life anymore. I feel lifeless. During my transition to this change, there were a few things happening in my life. I had a psychiatrist, my non-stop depression was coming to an end, I began to take adderall for my adhd, I had a girlfriend, I became more social, I was becoming more responsible about school, I began to listen to electronic music (mainly dubstep), I began making electronic music in my free time unprofessionally without any of the right tools and possibly damaging my hearing, my sleep schedule went completely wack, and I spent a shitload of time on the computer, mainly facebook. Later this lead to me quitting the track team and having a poor balance of healthy foods compared to the amount of junk I ate. I started gaining weight and getting pimples too. I learned to ignore everything in my life: girlfriend/friend troubles, family problems, physical/emotional damage of myself, my looks, my image. I didn't care about anything. That's when I realized that something changed me and was causing my body to brainlessly speed through to what will eventually be the end of my life. I can't stand it. I don't want to be trapped in this body forever if I cant experience life like I used to. I can't feel anything the same with my hands anymore, all the sounds that come through my ears are just noise, the tastes in my mouth and smells in my nose are either good or bad, the sides of my vision are blurry and fast. I need to be fixed, but I do not know what has caused my horrible change. Can anyone figure it out so I can target it and do everything I can to fix it? I have explained this to my old psychiatrist but he just wasn't helping so I stopped going. My doctor is only a pediatrician (hes a family friend and my rents are too lazy to get me a new one), my parents don't believe in psychological problems so they wont let me go to a psychologist.

Public Comments

1. simply see a psychologist, not a psychiatrist, they will very easily help you idenntify what bipolar/anxiety/whatever disorder that you might have and then they will tell you how to handle it gl, congrats on buliding up the chutzpah to post this btw
2. you could ask your dr to do some tests to see if there is any physical problems causing it.. you may have something putting pressure on your nerves in your neck or brain
3. Maybe you need to see a doctor, maybe a neurologist? Read up on "electrosmog", I think we are all living in conflicting electrical fields that are slowly frying our brains. Or maybe I'm just crazy, I don't know. I felt the change too.
4. Hi so why have you not reported all this to your doctor as it sounds your medication has made some difference to your bodies metabolism. at 17 years old hormones are not balanced anyway and the drugs you take for your condition will inter react with these hormones, so go and see a doctor and explain so the medication can be changed.